December 5, 2014 by heavymetalblunder
Legendary Hollywood Actor Robert De Niro has controversially been cast as, portly Motley Crue front man, Vince Neil in the up coming film version of ‘The Dirt‘.
Fans have been wondering for years if the film was going to happen and who would be cast as the members of ‘Bad boys of Rock and Roll‘. Any casting was always going to be a controversial subject, however, De Niro appears to have legitimized the project and united fans behind the film.
De Niro is believed to have been chosen based on his seminal performance as the voice of Don Lino from 2004’s Shark Tale. The producers of the film, Sandi and Brandi, have said that they’re father told them he was a good actor.
We don’t really know much about film *giggles*, but our daddy told us that Robbie was a really great actor, he told us he was in our favourite film Shark Tale, so we hired him. Vinny wasn’t very happy when he found out, as he said he’s too told, but he’s all signed up now! Oopsie!
It is believed that De Niro is going to be playing both young and old Vince Neil. Recent sightings of him have reported that he has lost 5 pounds and had long, blonde hair implants to play the young, hungry Vince from Motley’s beginnings. However, his challenge lies in gaining the 100 pounds to play modern day Vince, which outdoes his Raging Bull weight gain by 40 pounds.
Mr Neil appears to be the only member of The Crue that is upset with the casting. Tommy Lee has been seen leaving his local DVD store with stacks of De Niro movies and Nikki Sixx tweeted messages of support for De Niro:
Great to see we’ve got @robertdeniro on board, great actor. #thedirt
We needed someone who was able to gain weight as Vince has done. #methodacting
In his preparation for the role De Niro is reportedly planning to give up washing his clothes and showering to play the young Vince, complete a full 300 gig tour of the world whilst dealing with syphilis, gonorrhea and genital warts the size of a satsuma and drive, stoned, drunk and naked for a full year.
Following the release of these details, bookmakers Paddy Power have inserted De Niro as it’s favourite for the first celebrity death in 2015.